Monday, May 14, 2012

PEERING INTO DARK SHADOWS By John Rose

Mad Doctor
Mad Doctor's Note: Warning--many spoilers await.  You may want to read this after seeing the movie.  If you already have, read on.

So I'm reminded of the phrase, "It's only a movie."

We used to say that, once upon a time, when we were seated in the theatre watching a movie and they were about to do a reveal on the Big Scary Monster of the piece, or the hero was in dire straits, or something was coming up behind that particular scene's victim and was about to take them out.  In the Technological Age, we don't say that anymore because these days we're All Connected and such, and we blog about Things and read reviews and make decisions and generally Act Like Adults about things that used to thrill and terrify us.  But the Child Inside still remembers how we used to feel, sitting there in dark shadows watching flickering pictures on a screen, and the thrills we got and that wonderful feeling of being a part of something, of personal enjoyment, of being all connected.  The Technological Age, for all of its connectedness and innovations, has failed to properly capture this feeling for us, and because of this we demand much, much more accountability from our entertainment than we used to.

The poster
So with that, I recently went to see the new film Dark Shadows, starring Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Helena Bonham Carter, Bella Heathcote and Eva Green, directed by Tim Burton.  And I liked it.  I didn't loooove it, I didn't think it was The Greatest Thing Ever, and I didn't think it was as good or better than the original.  I just liked it, and I'll get it when it comes out on DVD, because I liked it that much.  And here's why.

Barnabas The First (Jonathan Frid)
Dark Shadows is, of course, based on the 1966-71 soap opera which related the adventures of a remorseful vampire named Barnabas Collins and his human family, scions of the small Maine community of Collinwood.  Upon Barnabas's first appearance a year into DS's run, the show immediately garnered a huge fanbase that continues to this day, and fostered two feature films in 1970 and '71 and a short-lived TV revival during the '90's.  Dark Shadows is regarded as an ahead-of-its-time groundbreaker because of its supernatural storylines featuring vampires, werewolves, witches, ghosts, extradimensional creatures and time travel, and its influence upon many shows that came after it (including Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Angel, True Blood, and The Vampire Diaries) is still wide-reaching.

"Are they kidding?"
When word got out that Tim Burton and Johnny Depp (who are both DS fans of long-standing) had plans to do a big-budget feature film of Dark Shadows, the response was expectant and hopeful.  Upon release of the film trailer, many DS fans were immediately outraged over the rather jokey scenes, the 1970's period setting, and Depp's portrayal of Barnabas Collins (whose original portrayer, Jonathan Frid, died in April of this year).  Much of the genre film fan community had disparaging remarks about Burton's DS anyway, due to it seemingly being yet another in a long line of ham-fisted Hollywood remakes designed to drag in viewers and make huge amounts of money while trampling all over fond memories of a beloved fan experience.

For my part, while I love Dark Shadows and always have, I cannot call myself a fan in the same spirit that the film's decriers do.  Dark Shadows achieved legendary status for me due to my not having ever seen it in my youth, but constantly hearing about it from older family members who had seen some of the show's original run.  Ye Reviewer is currently enjoying the series through Netflix, and I can say without reservation that despite it falling victim to the usual disliked soap-opera conventions, it is every bit worth watching and deserving of its legendary status.

At this point, some people will be saying "yeah, well, when your favorite thing gets remade into a big crappy movie, you'll change your tune."  For me, that has already happened.  Saw Scooby-Doo; hated it, but the sequel got it right.  Saw Star Trek; didn't exactly dislike it, but the Star Trek Universe represented there seemed mighty homogenized compared to the original series, and the whole timeline-reboot sequence was obviously shoehorned in because the writers ran out of plot.  Still refuse, to this day, to watch Gus Van Sant's remake of Psycho, and if I ever meet the guy I'm probably going to jail.  So I do understand your pain and what you are talking about.

"Okay, people, hear me out..."
But the thing is that Burton's version of Dark Shadows, while hardly perfect for either DS fans or fans of Tim Burton's earlier movies, is not that bad.  For starters, it is neither a remake or a retelling of the original story but more of a revision, and revisions work differently from remakes.  If you have never seen Dark Shadows, you might consider this a Second Draft of Dark Shadows; if you're a huge fan, you're going to dislike some or all of this film.  But it is neither a real remake (in the Hollywood sense) or completely awful, and like the original show, it tends to be its own thing.

Much of the original DS backstory is told in the first few minutes of the movie, which shows the Collins family arriving from England in 1760 and establishing themselves as founders and favorite sons of Collinsport, Maine.  The eldest son, Barnabas (Depp), completes the building of his family's palatial estate of Collinwood and becomes something of a playboy, getting caught in a love triangle between housemaid Angelique Bouchard (Green) and his true love, Josette DuPres (Heathcote).  Unfortunately, Angelique proves to be a witch, and Barnabas's refusal of her love dooms the Collins family and Josette.  Angelique casts a spell that kills Barnabas's parents, curses the Collins family and sends Josette over the cliffs at Widow's Hill, then curses Barnabas as a vampire.  She then turns the townsfolk of Collinsport against Barnabas, who bury him in a chained coffin in the woods.

Creepy, spooky, mysterious, dysfunctional: the Collins family
Two hundred years later, in 1972, both Collinwood and the Collins family, consisting of iron-handed matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Pfeiffer), ne'er-do-well brother Roger Collins (Jonny Lee Miller), rebellious daughter Carolyn Stoddard (Grace Chloe Moretz), Roger's troubled, ghost-obsessed son David (Gulliver McGrath), live-in psychiatrist Dr. Julia Hoffman (Bonham-Carter), and drunken houseservant Willie Loomis (Jackie Earle Haley) are in disarray, while Angelique has survived through the centuries to become the town's favorite daughter and build a profitable canning business that has all but destroyed the Collins fortune.  Into this stew of dysfunction and secrets enter two visitors: lost soul Victoria Winters (Heathcote) who becomes a governess to David and is hiding some secrets of her own, and Barnabas Collins, whose reappearance is foretold in a ghostly visit by Josette to Winters.  When Barnabas's coffin is rediscovered and opened by luckless construction workers, he quickly treks to the ruined Collinwood, revealing his secret to Elizabeth and showing her the lost treasures of Collinwood.  Barnabas ingratiates himself into the family, helping to rebuild its fortune and fishing business, attempting to cure his vampirism with Dr. Hoffman, and kindling a relationship with Winters, who appears to be the reincarnation of Josette.  Angelique re-enters his new life as well, seducing Barnabas and demanding that he return her love.  Barnabas refuses, and the film soon escalates into a war for control of Collinsport as Barnabas fights to save his family from Angelique's curse.

"No Happy Meal toys, eh?  That's regrettable..."
So that's the plot, and here's the skinny:  By virtue of being a feature film, the story told here will be vastly different from the original show.  Soap operas, due to appearing daily, are episodic and told over quite long periods of time, while a feature film has two hours or less to set up, tell and resolve its story.  Also, Burton is a dedicated DS fan (as opposed to some other director who would have been merely attached to the movie), and his love for the series is evident and obvious throughout the film.  Johnny Depp's performance as Barnabas, while containing the now-standard Quirky Detachment that is expected from him, maintains the melodramatic sincerity and histrionic menace that were part of Frid's characterization while fully exploiting the fish-out-of-water status that a vampire from another era would have in 1972.  And the film does feature enough scariness to illustrate that demographics were part of the studio's targeting in creating the trailer.  While there are plenty of jokes and humor, those scenes from the trailer are not all you see, and the resurrection of Barnabas (which features the most backhanded product placement I've ever seen in a film) and his return to Collinwood is both funny and a little sad at the same time.

"I am Collins... hear me roar."
"Hey, can you blame me?  Vampires are cool."
The supporting cast, while of course subject to comparisons to the original characters, illustrate that they are as much lost souls as Barnabas in this film.  Michelle Pfeiffer's Elizabeth is dignified and strong-willed, just as Joan Bennett's performance was in the original.  Miller's Roger Collins fares badly, as the original Roger was a stuffed shirt who was nevertheless loyal to Elizabeth, but here Roger is a sleaze who selfishly chooses a life away from Collinwood over his family and son when Barnabas threatens to reveal his attempts to find the Collinwood treasures.  McGrath's David, while not as precocious as the original, is key to the survival of the family during Angelique's endgame.  Cast members who suffer the worst from comparisons to the originals are Bonham-Carter's Hoffman, Moretz's Carolyn and Haley's Willie Loomis.  Loomis and Hoffman were important supporting players in the original series, but here neither are given quite enough to do.  Loomis is relegated to loopy Renfield-esque slapstick as Barnabas's dogsbody, and the relationship dynamic between Barnabas and Hoffman (a key series element) is given short shrift in the film.  However, it does continue the theme of lost souls with Julia's treatment and subsequent betrayal (she gives Barnabas blood transfusions in an attempt to cure his vampirism, but steals his original blood to turn herself into a vampire and be eternally young).  Moretz's Carolyn appears to be the standard surly teenager, but toward the end we discover that the Collins curse has touched her as well: she is really a werewolf.  It would have been better if a few more clues to this had been provided through the film, rather than springing it at the end.  If Burton's Dark Shadows is really guilty of anything, it is that it tries to please original DS fans by doing too much in one film.

Queen Wasp: Angelique
Honey Bee: Victoria/Maggie/Josette (?)
Finally, we come to the two opposing corners of Barnabas's love triangle, Eva Green's Angelique and Bella Heathcote's Victoria Winters.  Green's performance detracts from the original to show the psychosis behind Angelique's lust for Barnabas, and while her endgame sequence has been compared (somewhat unjustly) to Death Becomes Her, she ends up being the perfect femme-fatale foil for Barnabas's wounded and struggling morality, especially in the seduction scene where she and Barnabas literally (and passionately) destroy her office.  Heathcote's Winters (who also serves as Josette DuPres) is serviceable, but yet another example of the film trying to do too much: her character cobbles together the roles of Victoria and Maggie Evans from the original, revealing that Winters' real name is Maggie Evans, who as a child was haunted by Josette's ghost and shipped by her parents to a mental asylum.  Escaping to Collinwood, Winters is caught up in the drama of the Collins family and the return of Barnabas, and becomes the eventual prize in the war for Collinsport.  Although her character is understated and perhaps even a bit underwritten for the soap-opera Grand Guignol Burton is attempting to recapture, she does well in her role and plays quietly against Barnabas in her scenes, reining in a bit of Depp's eccentricities.

The mood of the original is well-captured in staging and sets, demonstrating Burton's quirky-Goth sensibilities while not burying the source material beneath them.  Like the original, Dark Shadows the movie is its own world, and the settings of Collinsport and Collinwood, despite the 70's period pastiches, give every appearance of being well off the beaten path.  Longtime Burton collaborator Danny Elfman's score adds the usual deliciously dark flavor to the film, even using a bit of original DS score (sharp-eared fans will catch Robert Cobert's "The Secret Room" cue at the beginning and in other places through the film).

"Yes, I'm completely serious."
Now here are the really good things about this movie: First of all, if you are tired of ethereally pretty supernatural creatures a la Twilight, Vampire Diaries and True Blood, or humorless raging savages with Serious Motives a la the Underworld series, this is the movie for you, as it handles vampires, witches, ghosts and werewolves in a more classical-based yet subversive manner.  Second, it has attracted interest in the original series, and as all episodes of DS still exist it hopefully will help to keep the series in perpetuity via electronic media and so forth.  (Though no one was shouting for special edition DVD sets of McHale's Navy when its movie version came out, I feel that Dark Shadows will fare differently.)

And despite what anyone wants to say, it's hardly a parody of the original.  We have had vampires and other supernatural creatures in the pop-culture consciousness for at least a millennium now, and while Burton's Dark Shadows digs no new ground in the vampire legend (and neither did the original), this film does nothing to make fun of the show or its fanbase.  If it spoofs anything, it spoofs the deadly, unhealthy seriousness and quest for realism we have attached to supernatural and horrific entertainment by setting classical Gothic melodrama in the 1970's, a time when pop-culture completely lacked the ability to be serious about anything.  In this age when we are demanding more from our sources of entertainment than our presidential candidates, we could use a little of those high spirits today, and Burton's Dark Shadows may hold the key to that.  Go see it with an open mind, and then indulge heavily in the original.  You might find yourself joining Team Barnabas after all.  And besides, it's only a movie.

There you go.

"With animosity toward none."



Wednesday, March 07, 2012

THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD: NOTES ON THE NEW VERSION OF THE MUNSTERS By John Rose

Mad Doctor
Disclaimer: Though the information revealed here is from a legitimate website, it is a description of a projected television pilot and must be considered extremely subject to change.

So a while back, there was talk of a new remake of The Munsters for NBC, which was to be developed by Bryan Fuller, who has created several acclaimed TV series such as Dead Like Me and Wonderfalls, with Bryan Singer (of House and X-Men movie directorial fame) to be executive producer.  Further reports also revealed that the new series would be a "dramedy" and would explore the origins of the Munster clan.

We're a happy family
So, horror fans (and Munsters fans, who are legion), let's talk about what this means.  Horror and fantasy are enjoying quite a resurgence on TV (witness such shows as Supernatural, American Horror Story, Once Upon A Time, The Vampire Diaries, The Secret Circle, the Being Human remake, and Grimm, to name a few), and so the time seems ripe for new adventures of the Munsters.  The Munsters, as every ghoulchild knows, is the venerable 1964-66 sitcom which revolves around the adventures of a family of monsters: Herman, the Frankenstein-monster father (Fred Gwynne), his vampire wife Lily (Yvonne DeCarlo), their werewolf son Eddie (Butch Patrick), cantankerous vampire father-in-law/mad scientist Count Sam "Grandpa" Dracula (Al Lewis) and the "white sheep" of the family, the beautiful and unfortunately very normal Marilyn (alternately played by Beverly Owen and Pat Priest).  Despite lasting only two seasons, The Munsters has a fanbase of longstanding and has sparked several reunion movies (the most well-known being the theatrically released Munster, Go Home! and the made-for-TV The Munsters' Revenge) and at least one series remake, the much-criticized and generally unpopular The Munsters Today.  The major concerns, of course, are the fact that the new series' vision has been described as "True Blood meets Modern Family" and is being touted as a drama rather than a comedy, and that most reboots of old favorites (such as Charlie's Angels and the often-talked-about-but-never-seen Wonder Woman) have gone belly up before they got started.

"Munster who?"
Fans' concerns, of course, are understandable.  The Munsters resonates with many people, even those who don't like horror, because (monster trappings notwithstanding) there is a touch of reality hidden deep in the show.  Despite its occasional slag as being a middle-class version of The Addams Family, which came out at the same time, the Munsters occasionally reflected what our families were actually like; in temperament and attitude, Herman and Lily are actually pretty close to real parents, while the Addamses were more like the parents kids wished they had.  And though the Addamses were a bit more intellectual in their comedy than the Munsters were, at heart The Munsters is a comic-horror parody of The Donna Reed Show, which at the time was the quintessential American family sitcom: one comparative look at TDRS's opening sequence with that of the Munsters' first season is proof.  To see the Munster clan transformed into a gloomy and modernized band of necrotic neurotics is hardly something committed Munsters fans would care for.

Recently, the Moviehole website (click our title link to access the full article) revealed a list of major spoilers for the new version of The Munsters, which at the time of this writing is now retitled Mockingbird Lane (a reference to the Munsters' original home address and also a definite bid for aligning with the Troubled Family Show crowd) and has been pushed back somewhat to allow NBC to bring more attention to the project and make time to assemble the perfect cast and direction.  So here's the basic skinny on this, which can be considered extremely subject to change (as per our disclaimer):

"So I'm a werewolf.  Wait... what?"
The new pilot, as well as a fair chunk of the new series, will largely focus on Eddie, whose werewolf genes have kicked in following the onset of puberty.  After a disastrous event with Eddie's camp scout troop, the Munster clan must move to Mockingbird Heights following a "baby bear attack" (ahem) and manage, with the help of Marilyn (who serves as the smokescreen for the family, which is not a bad idea considering her mostly one-joke appearances in the original show) to score a dilapidated mansion in the area, literally saving it from the wrecking ball.  (Of course, the house has a bad history; it was once the home of a serial killer who preyed on hobos, and a few bodies may even be still in the walls.  Still, location's everything, right?)

Shortly after, the Munsters arrive in crates at their new home (with Grandpa and Lily, true to their vampiric natures, reassembling themselves from huge masses of rats and spiders) and begin to settle in.  Major conflicts stem from Eddie's problems with his lycanthropy and Herman's need for a new heart, which runs on a steampunk engine and is breaking down.  Lily also figures in the new-heart issue: she doesn't want Herman to get a new heart because the current one belonged to Eddie's biological father.  And Grandpa, who has been feeding from animals to keep Eddie from flaking out over his monster lineage, is looking forward to feeding from humans again now that Eddie's truly "one of the family..."

"Sparkly vampires?  Hmmph!!"
Now, despite the rather dark and melodramatic twists in the story, this is not totally bad on paper.  Much of it will depend on how it's depicted and handled, and any TV venture requires time to work its spell; genre shows more so than most.  My personal problem with it is that the story itself does not quite come across to me as The Munsters; though Herman and Lily are still loving, caring parents (plans are that they will assist Eddie in his new struggle, which here reads as a large nod to the MTV version of Teen Wolf), the writers plan for them to look a bit more human than what we're used to (Herman, being a Frankenstein monster, will still have quite a few scars due to being assembled from parts of other men).  And I seriously doubt if Al Lewis would approve of this new, improved and much more frightening version of Grandpa, who reads as nothing like Lewis's crafty yet friendly old vampire.  If anything, this new version of the Munsters comes across as closer to the late and somewhat lamented The Gates, which detailed the adventures of a human family who become caretakers of a gated community of monsters, vampires, werewolves, and so forth.  Personally, I think if we are to have a new Munsters series, the wisest and perhaps simplest thing to do would be to recover the cast of The Munsters' Scary Little Christmas, a 1996 made-for-TV Munsters movie that paid excellent tribute to the original show while maintaining a somewhat sharper edge, and go from there.  (For the curious, our own Monster Shop review of this movie can be found here.)

However, the wisest and simplest thing often has nothing to do with making television.  So there you go.  It remains to be seen how the new Munsters will play out, but I for one will keep an eye out to see what happens.  Maybe even two.  There's still some extra ones in the jar...

Thursday, February 23, 2012

MONSTERGRRLS AUTHOR INTERVIEWED BY WHY DID YOU WRITE THAT? By John Rose

Below is a link to an interview I recently did with Peter Joseph Lewis, the mastermind behind the innovative authors' blog WHY DID YOU WRITE THAT? He recently spoke with me about my first book in the MonsterGrrls series, Out From The Shadows.  Click the link below to read the full interview.


Why Did You Write That?: John Rose - Out From the Shadows: It is our pleasure today to have John Rose, author and creator of The MonsterGrrls Series. He is promoting the first book in the series, Out...

Wednesday, January 04, 2012

NEW MONSTERGRRLS PROMO VIDEO By John Rose

Presenting our new 2012 promotional video for MonsterGrrls.  The music is an original piece entitled "The MonsterGrrls Theme" and was written by our fiend Greg West, who composed an entire suite of music about the Grrls.  Witness the mayhem below...

You can also watch this on YouTube at our title link above.

Monday, October 31, 2011

TALES FROM THE MONSTER SHOP: RESURRECTING HAMMER FILMS By John Rose

So it's Halloween, and may I wish everyone who joins us this evening a most happy, happy Halloween.  Usually at this point in the Thir13en For Halloween, I talk about a really cool horror film that some of the horror fans out there may have ignored, overlooked or simply are not aware of.  Well, this Halloween I'm bringing along a whole studio.  The legendary Hammer Film Productions has returned to the public eye with plans to make horror films for a new generation of Hammerheads, and with the release of the successful Wake Wood, their loving remake of Tomas Alfredson's Let The Right One In (titled Let Me In) and the upcoming The Woman In Black, it looks like they're in it to win it, folks.

The Public Life Of Henry The Ninth
Hammer Films has actually been around since 1934, when it was begun by William Hinds, a comedian and entrepeneur who named the company from his own stage name, Will Hammer.  The first Hammer release was the successful comedy The Public Life Of Henry The Ninth, playfully titled after Britain's Academy-Award-nominated The Private Life Of Henry VIII.  Hammer put out a further four films (among them The Mystery Of The Marie Celeste, starring Bela Lugosi) before being forced into bankruptcy in 1937.  In 1946, Hammer was revived by James Carreras, and the company went into shooting various adaptations of radio serials and original mysteries.

Professor Quatermass
1955 saw Hammer's first real entry into the horror realm with an unexpected success: an adaptation of a sci-fi serial shown on BBC Television, The Quatermass Xperiment.  The popularity of this film led to a sequel, Quatermass 2, and Hammer began to investigate American distribution for its product.  Hooking up with Associated Artists Productions (AAP), AAP's head, Eliot Hyman, sent a script for an adaptation of Frankenstein to his contact at Hammer.  Due to concerns that the script followed Universal's film Son Of Frankenstein a tad too closely, the script was eventually rewritten by Jimmy Sangster as The Curse Of Frankenstein.  Directed by Terence Fisher, Curse Of Frankenstein brought together the soon-to-be-infamous team of Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee, who would appear separately and together in many more of Hammer's most famous horror productions.
The Curse Of Frankenstein

The Not-So-Good Doctor
The Very Evil Count
The raging international success of COF brought forth a sequel, The Revenge Of Frankenstein, in which Cushing reprised his performance of Dr. Frankenstein.  Around this time, Hammer began to consider other horror icons, and in 1958, Horror Of Dracula exploded into theatres with Cushing and Lee doing another tag-team effort as Van Helsing and Dracula.  The technicolor radicality of the production and Christopher Lee's hissing, spitting, animalized performance as the Count broke international box-office records and secured Hammer the rights to remake the entire Universal library.

Queen Of The Hammers
Lovely Miss Caroline
Ingrid gets frisky


The success of The Curse Of Frankenstein and Horror Of Dracula led to entire cycles of films based on these iconic monsters, with Cushing and Lee cavorting as Van Helsing and Dracula for most of the Dracula cycle and Cushing gnawing the scenery as the ever-deranged and viciously sarcastic Dr. Frankenstein through several Frankenstein sequels.  Both of these cycles, and Hammer's other pictures, also gave rise (in more ways than one) to the entity known as Hammer Glamour, as a bevy of beautiful actresses were certain to appear in each new picture.  Among the notable Hammer Glamourites were Ingrid Pitt (who appeared as Countess Karnstein in The Vampire Lovers), Barbara Shelley (who appeared in Dracula, Prince Of Darkness and The Gorgon, and would soon become Hammer's top female star), Martine Beswick (who had the title role in Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde), and the legendary Caroline Munro (famed for Hammer's somewhat offbeat Captain Kronos, Vampire Hunter).  Apart from the Frankenstein and Dracula cycles, Hammer did four notable films based on the Mummy (The Mummy, Curse Of The Mummy's Tomb, The Mummy's Shroud, and Blood From The Mummy's Tomb) and would also create other famous (and notorious) films such as Plague Of The Zombies (which would precede Night Of The Living Dead by about two years), Curse of The Werewolf (with the much-loved Oliver Reed as the Werewolf), and adaptations of both The Phantom Of The Opera (with Herbert Lom) and H. Rider Haggard's novel She (featuring Ursula Andress as, well, She).  Hammer wound down in the 1970's with a disastrous production of Alfred Hitchcock's The Lady Vanishes, which all but bankrupted the studio.  However, the Hammer films would not be forgotten, as scads of horror hosts in local markets and such shows as Creature Features and Chiller Theatre would include most of Hammer's output in their offerings, ensuring their place--and much love--in the minds and hearts of horror fans.

Wake Wood
Let Me In
In 2007, Hammer resurfaced in the news, as Dutch producer John De Mol purchased the Hammer films rights and planned to restart the studio.  Their first production was a Myspace-exclusive contemporary vampire story called Beyond The Rave.  In 2008, work began on Wake Wood, shooting in Donegal, Ireland with backing by the Irish Film Board, and led to Wake Wood seeing a limited UK/Ireland release in March of 2011.  Bolstered by good reviews and success, Hammer soon partnered with Overture Films and Relativity Media to introduce a 2010 remake of the acclaimed Swedish vampire film Let The Right One In, titled Let Me In.

In 2012, Hammer will return to the Gothic sensibilities with which it made its mark, via a new supernatural thriller titled The Woman In Black.  Based on the Susan Hill novel of the same name, the film stars Daniel Radcliffe (of Harry Potter fame) and is the story of a Victorian-era London lawyer who journeys to a remote English village for the settlement of the recently deceased Alice Drablow, and finds a terrible supernatural mystery that endangers his own child.  Set to hit theaters in February of 2012, The Woman In Black has all the Gothic horrors and mystery that made Hammer great, and in the current mire of remakes, sequels and half-baked genre films, it's no doubt going to be one of the better horror releases of 2012.  Watch for it.  We'll be there.


In closing, the MonsterGrrls and I, as always, have taken great delight in bringing you fun, laughs, and frights for Halloween, and we hope you stick around for what we do next.  May all of you reading this have a prosperous, safe, and happy Halloween for 2011, and please join us again for the party in 2012.  This time, maybe we'll see if we can't blow up the lab...

Happy Halloween to all,
John Rose (the Mad Doctor) and the MonsterGrrls: Frankie, Bethany, Harriet and Punkin 

SPECIAL THANKS TO: John Dimes, Rebecca Bishop, Mod Ghoul, Diane Irby, Sinister Minister and the Altargirls, Uncle Fright, Marlena Midnite, Nicolette Lewis and Sasha Trasha, Bobby Gammonster, Joe Flynn, The Bone Jangler, The Pumpkin Man, The Movie Gravedigger, Jebediah Buzzard and the great Count Gore De Vol.  We couldn't have done any of this without you, and keep up all your good work.  Happy Halloween to you all from all of us here at the Monster Shop!! --J.R. and the Grrls

ATTACK OF THE HORROR HOSTS: COUNT GORE DE VOL By The MonsterGrrls

Hello, everybody, and welcome, welcome, welcome to The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween! This is Frankie Franken speaking for myself and the other MonsterGrrls, and today we are so excited! Not just because it's Halloween, but today we are speaking with a living legend for the Attack Of The Horror Hosts, the fabulous frightmeister Count Gore De Vol!!
Currently based in Virginia, Count Gore De Vol has hosted horror films since 1971, and is known not only as one of the best horror hosts but also one of the greatest. He has been the subject of a documentary called Every Other Day Is Halloween, and today he is known for being the world's first horror host to take his show to the Internet! Creature Feature The Weekly Web Program not only shows movies but also does reviews and interviews with other leading horror hosts of the scene. Naturally, it couldn't be just one of us to interview him, so on this Halloween, before we hit The Dark Beneath (our local teen monster club in Morlock Heights) for its annual Halloween party, we all sat down to have a chat with the Count!
Frankie: Welcome to The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween, Mr. De Vol! Please tell us about yourself and what you do!
I host horror, science fiction and fantasy movies on the Internet, in traditional style. That means it's one vampire against a world full of bad public domain films and I try my best to make them tolerable!
Bethany: How did your illustrious career begin?
I hosted my first movie on WDXR-TV in Paducah, Kentucky in 1971. However, I really got into the role of vampire around Halloween 1970 when I was asked to help out at a Halloween walk for the Paducah Parks and Rec Department. Then late one night in 1971 after one too many beers I blurted out to the station GM that we should have a vampire hosting horror movies. He turned to me and said,"You're hired!" However, I had to start all over again when I moved to WDCA in Washington, DC and finally got a long term show with Creature Feature that was on the air from 1973 to 1980, and then again from 1984 to 1987.
Punkin: Sir, you is known as the first horror host to start usin this here Internet. What caused this, and how has this big old technologcial gadget changed your work?
Well, in 1998, I realized that with the Internet, people would find my DJ company site and tell me how much they missed Count Gore! I realized that we could put hosted movies on the net then because everyone was using dial-up, but I also realized that someone had to be the first and it might as well be me! So, I took the show format, minus the movie, and added celebrity interviews, product reviews and more to create Creature Feature the Weekly Web Program on July 11, 1998.

Harriet: First of all, Mr. D, you are totally rockin' that 'stache! Second, what are some of your favorite horror movies? Do you enjoy modern horror movies or are you more of a classicist?
I enjoy movies with good plots, stories, acting and most of all...suspense!! I don't care when they were made. Just showing me a film with gruesome special effects does nothing for me.

Frankie: You've inspired many others to take up horror hosting. How do you feel about this?
I’m very flattered and honored that others have been inspired by my work. And, I also encourage and help them when asked. For a while horror hosting seemed to be a dying art form, but not anymore. Next, the world!!!
Bethany: What is your favorite memory of Halloween, and what does it mean to you?
My favorite Halloween was the 1985 "Monster Bash!" This was a hosted horror movie and party that was broadcast live from a local cinema and draft house. We had hundreds of people in costume, a live band, games, prizes, lots of alcohol and we even showed Damien: Omen 2 for the folks at home. It was meaningful because it was the biggest most expensive show I had produced to that time, and I also got to party with my fans!
Frankie: Cool! What are you doing for this Halloween season?
Unlike many hosts, I try and take Halloween off and let the mere mortals play. After all, for me, every other day is Halloween, which also happens to be the title of a great feature-length documentary about my career. To that extent, I bring out the fog machine, effects lights and music from Midnight Syndicate and prepare my domain for the brave souls who dare come up to ask me for candy.
And that is our interview with Count Gore De Vol! Gosh, we have had so much fun this Halloween hanging out with all these different horror hosts, and if you have a horror host who shows movies in your area, then do your best to support them in their endeavors! Plus, be sure to click our title link so you can check out the Count's website and see all the cool things he's doing--which we hope he'll be doing for a long time to come!
The Mad Doctor will be in soon with our last post for the season, so come back for the finale of The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween for 2011! And from all of us to all of you, have a Merry, Scary, Happy Halloween!
Sincerely,
Francesca "Frankie" Franken
Bethany Ruthven
Petronella "Punkin" Nightshade
and Harriet Von Lupin,
The MonsterGrrls!!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

ATTACK OF THE HORROR HOSTS: JEBEDIAH BUZZARD AND THE FRIGHT-TIME FUNHOUSE By Punkin Nightshade

Howdy there! This here is Petronella Nightshade, and everbody calls me Punkin. Today I am speakin to you through this Internet blog for The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween, and I am doin another one of the Attack Of The Horror Hosts. I am speakin here with Mr. Jebediah Buzzard, and it seems to me that I knew some Buzzards way back when, but he is from Arkansaw and they was down from somewhere around Louisiana so I reckon they ain't no kin. Mr. Buzzard is hostin horror movies on his show what is called Fright-Time Funhouse, but he used to be a pitchman in a carnival one time, and he is also a musical feller and has done recorded him a CD and made him a movie and all kind of things, so I reckon he is up to more didoes than just hostin horror films. So here is me talkin to Mr. Buzzard.

Howdy do, and welcome to
The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween! Please tell us about yourself and what you do!

Hey, ghouls an' goblins, Jebediah Buzzard here. I’m the host of Fright Time Funhouse, Arkansas' first horror host show!

I hear tell that besides doin your own show you was also on that Monster Madhouse. How did you get connected with them folk, and how did you start hostin Fright Time Funhouse?

After I moved to the Eastern panhandle of the WV/Northern VA/ Washington D.C. region, I found that my show had been playing in Falls Church, VA for two years thanks to Curtis Prather, the founder of the Horror Host Underground. I soon met Karlos Borloff and crew, and the rest is history. As far as starting the Funhouse, it's a contractual obligation with the Prince of Darkness. Now I'm back in Fayetteville, Arkansas, ready to submit a Halloween comeback special.

I hear you is also a musician with a recorded CD, and that you's connected with a short horror film
called Golgotha, AR. Can you please tell us about that?

I did release a CD back in early fall; Jebediah Buzzard and the Buzztones’ D.I.Y. or Die!!! I credit Unknown Hinson for the inspiration. When I met and interviewed him in Vienna, VA he told me to "practice yer guitar and sangin' ever day, and avoid a prison sentence." The new producer of Fright Time Funhouse, Shane Steddum (a.k.a. Nahash ha'Rames) wrote, co-directed and starred in Golgotha, AR. Oh, and by the way, both Golgotha, AR and D.I.Y. or Die!!! are available through Amazon.

What is Golgotha, AR about?

Golgotha, AR is an unusual zombie film in that the zombies are seen more as tragic heroes. There are actually no violent scenes in the entire film, which proves that gratuitous gore is not necessary to disturb and creep one the ever-lovin'-Hell out!

Well, there is not much horror films what gives folks the creeps no more, so maybe we shall give that one a spin. But what's your favorite horror film?

The Abominable Dr. Phibes.

What does Halloween mean to you?

It's the time of year when one can get the best deals on massive bags of Sweet Tarts, and get away with fantastic pranks. You can run at someone with a big fake knife and yell "I'm gonna rip your guts out through yer eye sockets!" and not get arrested. I also celebrate it in the Celtic pagan sense.

What will you do for Halloween this year?

Handing out CD samples, trading cards, and taking little Elvis Buzzard trick-or-treating.

So that there is my interview with Mr. Buzzard, and you can click on them links all through the postin to find out more about all what he has done, and watch some of them horror movies he hosts. It sure sounds like our Mr. Buzzard shall be one busy feller this Halloween.

And speakin of busy, I am havin to leave you now cause it shall be Halloween tomorrow and I got ever kind of thing to do, but y'all come back for our next postin for The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween. May blessings be on you and yours this Halloween season, and take care of yourselves and one another cause sometimes that is all we got in this old world. Happy Halloween, everbody!

Sincerely,
Petronella "Punkin" Nightshade

Saturday, October 29, 2011

ATTACK OF THE HORROR HOSTS: THE MOVIE GRAVEDIGGER By Frankie Franken

Hello, everybody, and welcome back for our next Attack Of The Horror Hosts post on The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween! This is Frankie Franken, and I'm reporting on the very interesting Movie Gravedigger, who is creating his own hosted series of video reviews of your favorite horror movies--and preparing to host horror movies himself! Want to know where the best horror movies are buried? Let's talk to the Movie Gravedigger!

Welcome to
The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween! Can you please share with our readers about yourself and what you do?

Our current work is a on-going series of video horror-movie reviews that contain a mix of movie footage, commentary, and humor. It is done in costume on our horror set, which is all real, not greenscreen. I am the character The Movie Gravedigger, but it is not a one-man show. My son Ryan J. Kinney is a 21-year-old senior at Mercyhurst College in Erie, Pa working on a degree in pre-law English. We co-created the character and overall idea. Ryan writes most of the material as well as doing the photography and editing.

Family shows are always good! Is Movie Gravedigger open to all horror films or a select period?

We cover all periods of horror and include mainstream, uncommon and indy movies in our areas of interest.

What inspired the creation of Movie Gravedigger? How long have you been doing it?

Movie Gravedigger was in the idea stage for about two years. The actual filming work on the reviews just started in August 2011.

Since you are a reviewer of horror movies, what is your viewpoint on the state of horror films today?

Unfortunately, I often find myself leaving the theater disappointed. I do not believe all horror films need to be good stories to be scary, but there does seem to be a lack of well-told stories. I think a lot of the disappointment lies in things being so over hyped that it can't help but be a letdown.

We hear that you may be hosting films soon. Can you share?

Yes. This is actually the first time I've mentioned this in public but we will be hosting horror movies on TV on the Mercyhurst College TV station staring in November or December 2011. Really looking forward to this. We also have plans for several videos that I'm not ready to go into detail on yet.

We wish you good luck! What is your best memory of Halloween?

Oh, so many great Halloweens--so many costumes, so many memories. I've trick-or-treated in rain, snow, cold and warm weather. When I was about six, I had a Green Lantern costume and I got sick and couldn't go out, but my mom salvaged the night by letting me pass out the treats (and of course infect the entire neighborhood). One of my favorite Halloweens was when Ryan was little. My work had us relocate to another town for three years. On Halloween during Year One, Ryan got third place in a school costume contest. On Halloween during Year Two, he got second place and in the third and final year at that school he won the scariest costume. I guess I got better at doing horror make-up.

What does Halloween mean to you?

Halloween is my favorite holiday. Here in northwest Pennsylvania, the leaves change and October is so full of color. We get to dress up as anything our imagination can create and take to the streets or meet up with friends, How great to see what original ideas come from our imaginations! I am all for creating a spring equivalent of Halloween so we don't have to wait a whole year. (Right, like it isn't Halloween for me everyday!) Maybe St. George's Day (April 23rd). Who's with me?!

I'll join you for that, and so will the other MonsterGrrls! What will you do for Halloween this year?

Wow! This year the whole month of October has gone wild. On top of relocating our business, Needful Things Coins & Collectables and operating the business, Ryan is going to school full time.

Ryan and I are both working at a local haunt called Cornophobia on Friday and Saturday nights. I do make-up for the actors and play the Movie Gravedigger character at the entrance to the haunt. In addition we will be at the Eerie Horror Fest October 27, 28, 29 & 30th. They really have a great group of celebrities this year, and Greg Ropp and his crew put on a fantastic show every year.

I am also trying to help raise funds to save the Chapel at
Evan's City Pa. Cemetery where the opening scenes for the 1968 Night of the Living Dead movie was filmed. The building has fallen into disrepair and a group of concerned fans and cast members from the film are trying to save this old building from demolition. To learn more check out "the Living Dead Festival" page on Facebook.

I have a little story about my last visit to Evan's City Cemetery. In August we shot some footage for a future episode of Movie Gravedigger at the Cemetery. A lot of people stop just to take photos. A couple with their children stopped and talked to us they had driven over 500 miles out of their way on vacation just to stop and shoot a few photos. As we were driving away I called out the window in my most ghoulish voice: They're coming to get you Barbara! The woman laughed so hard she nearly fell over a tombstone. Her children and husband were laughing like crazy. I'll always remember that, and I'm sure they will too.

To learn more about the Movie Gravedigger and all the cool things he's doing, just click on the links throughout our post. Needful Things Coins And Collectables is located at 210 High St., Waterford, PA 16441, so if you're in the Waterford area, stop by and tell them Frankie Franken and the MonsterGrrls sent you!

Be back soon for more of The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween, because we're coming down to the wire!

Sincerely, Francesca "Frankie" Franken

ATTACK OF THE HORROR HOSTS: THE PUMPKIN MAN OF FRIGHT NIGHT THEATER By The MonsterGrrls

Hello, everybody, this is Frankie Franken and the MonsterGrrls reporting for Tales From The Monster Shop, and today's Attack Of The Horror Hosts post features the very unusual Pumpkin Man, who hosts classic horror movies on his own show, Fright Night Theater. FNT also features classic hard rock and metal songs along with lots of horror-host goofiness, and even though he's really busy around Halloween time, Pumpkin Man graciously sat down for a quick interview with us!

Frankie: Welcome to
The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween! Please tell us about yourself and what you do.

Pumpkin Man: I'm The Pumpkin Man! I'm over 2000 years old and I
don't look a day over 25. (laughs) Anyway, I love horror movies and the classic Universal Monsters. I love them so much I host a show called FRIGHT NIGHT THEATER!

Bethany: What is the origin of the Pumpkin Man? What inspired you to be a horror host?


Pumpkin Man:
I come from long ago when pagans worshipped All Hallows Eve! My inspiration is scaring everyone I can.

Bethany: Hmm. What's
your favorite horror movie?

Pumpkin Man:
Well, I guess if I have to pick just one, it would be Halloween!

Harriet: Cool! That's just about the only modern horror movie we like, although Mad Doc has pretty good taste sometimes.

Frankie: How do you create your show?


Pumpkin Man:
I create my show by ad-libbing every damn thing... (laughs)

Punkin: What do you think about all them new remade horror films, Mr. Punkin Man?


Pumpkin Man:
Don't get me started on that! I HATE THE REMAKE MACHINE!! Why can't people with original ideas and stories get onscreen? Because Hollywood is a bunch of IDIOTS!

Bethany: Don't hold back, darling.

Frankie: What was your favorite Halloween costume?


Pumpkin Man:
My favorite costume is mine! (laughs)

Punkin: What was your best Halloween?


Pumpkin Man:
Every Halloween is best to me.

Frankie: What does Halloween mean to you?

Pumpkin Man: Halloween means everything to me. It's the only time of the year where the victims come to see me... Wait!!! I mean visitors. Yeah, that's it, visitors come to see me.

And that is our interview with the Pumpkin Man, who can be seen on his own channel at Youtube and at the Horror Host Graveyard! Be back with us for our next installment of The MonsterGrrls' Thir13en For Halloween, and get ready because the Ghost Wonderful Time Of The Year will soon be here!

Sincerely,
Francesca "Frankie" Franken,

Bethany Ruthven,

Petronella "Punkin" Nightshade
and Harriet Von Lupin,

The MonsterGrrls!!