Monday, July 23, 2007

PITILESS OBSERVATIONS By Bethany Ruthven: Review Of HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS By J. K. Rowling


Good evening, darlings, and thank you for reading. As you all probably know (mostly because the bloody media won't let us alone about anything anymore), the seventh and final book in J. K. Rowling's much-admired Harry Potter series, Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, has just been released. Having finished it, I was initially loath to do a review of it because, quite frankly, none of us here at MonsterGrrls Central have any intention of giving away the answer to the big question: Does Harry Potter die?

Nevertheless, we must respond, so here is the MonsterGrrls' official answer, which I have been duly authorized to give: Buy the bloody thing and read it yourself if you want to find out, you grubby little git. What kind
of monsters do you think we are?

Now, I'm sure that some of you are wondering how I'm going to be able to review this book without giving away the proper answer to the does-Harry-die question. Well, here's how it goes:

People die. Other people become seriously injured. Some other people prove themselves to be right sodding bastards. Still other people confirm deep suspicions about themselves and their character that you have probably had all along. There's a quest (duh). There's quite a bit of violence, fighting and magic-using, which goes without saying (also duh). Two major characters do die, after all, in quite spectacular ways. (No, I'm not going to tell you who. See above.) Tons of secrets are finally revealed
.

And in the end (and I hope I'm not giving too much away by saying this), that which has been given the least amount of analysis and scrutiny throughout the whole of this series, that which has had almost no press or media attention at all, is that which ultimately saves the day.

Now read the bleeding thing yourself and you'll see what I'm talking about.

Sincerely yours,
Bethany Ruthven

BETHANY'S RATING:
Full marks. Completely sodding brilliant. But then, it's J. K. Rowling, so what else could it be?


POST-MORTEM: In the event that you are now searching around for something else to take up your time, an excellent fantasy called The MonsterGrrls is available for purchase at http://www.monstergrrls.com, or go directly to http://www.cafepress.com/themonstershop. It's quite good and more spiritually satisfying than being on Myspace, so come round and have a look. --B. R.